melanie regretevator

Seraph gripped his head, threatening to rip out his hair as tears poured from his eyes. “I am a coward, remember? I ate that plum because I wanted to escape the pain I now know I deserved. But I wish that plum really had killed me. I wish I had died that day. It would have been better than a life with no hope of redemption. Every morning, I open my eyes and remember waking up after the fight. Realizing you’re alive after trying to end it all, I never knew something could be so painful. Every breath hurt, every beat of my heart was agony, every thought in my mind felt like hot lead, and it all comes again fresh every morning. All I’ve wanted to do since then is… finish what I started.”“I know how you feel.”

Sarah was staring a hole through her phone screen when her dad came home again that night. She knew that today was going to suck, but it didn’t help her at all knowing that in advance. All her schoolwork and tests were done in a daze, and her afterschool practice was abysmal. She felt like a drunk missing all the receives and shots she took. No doubt her friends were talking behind her back; despite the fact they told her to go home early if she wasn’t feeling well.How you doing, Sare-Bear?” Her dad asked tentatively.

“No problem hon,” Her dad called after her, happy to see that both of their moods had improved this weekend, while being none the wiser on why that was the case.